


In Which Leia Is Rey's First Kiss

by FemmeslashFanatic (with_bleeding_hands)



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Consent, F/F, First Kiss, Food, Surgery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-08-16
Packaged: 2018-11-30 11:57:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11463108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/with_bleeding_hands/pseuds/FemmeslashFanatic
Summary: Exactly What It Says on the Tin. A collection of ficlets about this subject.





	1. Special

**Author's Note:**

> You should know the drill by now.

Rey hung back as the rest of the Resistance members filed away, another security briefing finished. Leia watched her curiously. “Something I can do for you, Rey?”

Rey nodded and walked closer to Leia. “Well…something you can do for me if it’s okay with you.”

“I saw you having trouble at chow today,” said Leia. “You seemed confused by the idea that you could actually choose what you got to eat.”

Rey blushed and nodded.

“Do you want help at dinner?”

“That would be nice,” said Rey almost shyly. “But…” she moved closer yet to Leia, resting her hands on Leia’s shoulders. “May I kiss you?”

Leia stepped backward, eyebrows raising. “Did Jessika put you up to this? Or…who did?”

Rey blinked, her expression blank. “Nobody put me up to it.”

Leia didn’t need her Force sensitivity to tell that Rey was telling the truth. “Then why would you ask that?”

Rey took a deep breath. “I’ve never kissed anyone before. I’ve never wanted to kiss anyone before.” Her words had taken on a quality that suggested to Leia that Rey had rehearsed this. “But recently, I’ve bonded with so many people. I’ve been hugged, and I liked it, and I want more contact. And I…” Rey steeled herself. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. I’ve been hearing legends about Princess Leia my whole life. But when you hugged me yesterday…I never wanted you to let go, even though we’d never met.” 

“So you picked me to be your first kiss?”

Rey nodded. “I don’t know why, but I’ve felt some kind of bond with you since I first laid eyes on you. I think…I think it might have something to do with us both being sensitive to the Force.”

Leia nodded slowly. “I know exactly what you’re talking about, Rey, but I’m still not going to kiss you.”

Rey’s face fell. “Why?”

Leia took one of Rey’s hands between her two. “Your age, for one thing. Why don’t you wait until your friend Finn is awake and kiss him?”

Rey thought about that. “Finn is very dear to me, but…I don’t want to kiss him, not like I do with you.”

“If you’d rather it be a woman, I’m sure Jessika would be only too glad.”

Rey shook her head. “I know I’ve only just met both you and Jessika, but I feel closer to you.” She paused. “Is it just my age?”

Leia shook her head. “I sensed all of the deaths on Hosnian Prime, including my assistant Korr, who was only there because I sent her. And…and Han’s death, and the Dark Side awakening in my son. Those feelings haven’t subsided much. I’m still carrying those deaths, and it hurts. I’d do just about anything to make the pain go away.” She brushed the back of one hand against Rey’s cheek. “Including kiss you. But it would be selfish of me, to kiss you just to feel something other than pain.”

“Maybe I want to kiss you so you can feel something good.” Rey reached for Leia, cupping the smaller woman’s face in her hands. Leia’s hands fell to her sides and her eyes went blank. Startled, Rey stepped back. “I’m sorry,” she said, not sure what she had done wrong.

Leia blinked, seeming to come back to herself. “It’s all right.” She smiled sadly. “Did you just actually respect my wishes?”

It took Rey a few moments to extract meaning from that. “What do you mean?”

“I thought you were going to kiss me anyway, even though I said I didn’t want you to.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Rey insisted. “Who would do that?”

Leia turned away. “Han did. The first time he kissed me.” Leia’s voice quaked. “My home had just been destroyed. I wasn’t interested in any romantic entanglements. I wasn’t interested in anything but staying alive and refusing to cry over Alderaan.”

Rey walked to Leia and gently gathered her close. Leia hugged her tightly, pressing her face to Rey’s shoulder. Rey could feel her trembling. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“It’s all right,” said Leia, even though it was obvious that she was crying. She lifted her head back to look at Rey, and Rey brushed her tears away with her sleeve. “You know what? Forget it. If you’re okay with kissing someone whose motivation is not hurting for five damn seconds, I’ll kiss you.” Leia’s hands made fists in Rey’s shirt. “Not that I would ever object to kissing someone like you. If only you weren’t so young…” 

“What do you mean, ‘someone like me’?” Rey asked.

“Someone brave,” said Leia with a watery smile. “Someone who has been through hell and has every right to be bitter and angry, but somehow managed to hold onto hope. Someone who could have known Finn for a very short amount of time, but still mean enough to him that he was ready to run headlong into mortal peril to help you. Someone special.”

“You think I’m special?” Rey whispered. “I’m just a scavenger.”

“Of course you’re special.” Leia laughed shortly, once. “Well, maybe I have other motivations for kissing you. Besides being tired of hurting.”

“So…may I kiss you now?” Rey asked, and Leia nodded. “I…I haven’t done this…”

“Tilt your head down and to the right. I can show you.”

Rey did. Leia’s warm lips met hers, applying gentle pressure for a long moment, backing off slightly, then returning just a little bit harder. Rey caught on to the rhythm of it fairly quickly, but couldn’t figure out exactly what to do with her hands, and found herself almost too distracted from the kisses by Leia’s strong, small hands caressing her back. A tiny, unintentional noise escaped Rey’s throat, and Leia backed off. “Too much?”

“No! No, not at all. It was wonderful.”

Leia gently kneaded the base of Rey’s spine with her fingertips. “If you let me kiss you again, this time it will be because I want to kiss you, not because I want a nice distraction. Although you are providing a very, very nice distraction.”

Rey closed her eyes. “Your hands feel just as good as your lips.”

“Do you want me to not use my hands?”

“You can do whatever you want with your hands,” Rey murmured, leaning down to kiss Leia again.

Leia kept her hands to Rey’s back for the most part. The kisses lasted a long time, until Leia reached to caress Rey’s throat and Rey gasped, tilting her head back.

“You’re not ticklish?”

“N-no.”

Leia leaned up to drop several gentle kisses on Rey’s neck. “Is this okay?”

Rey held Leia close, her hands gripping the other woman’s shoulders tightly. “Yes.”

Leia softly kissed Rey’s shoulder. “I think that’s enough for now.”

“Can’t we do more?”

Leia thought about that, smiling. “We can. I have a few ideas. I’m going to guess you’ve never had a back massage. Or you could have a bath in my private bathroom, and I could dry and braid your hair afterward.”

“A bath?” Rey’s eyes lit up. “With you?”

Leia chuckled. “We don’t have to conserve water like that here, so no, I don’t have to take a bath with you.”

Rey’s expression immediately rearranged itself into one of utter disappointment, and Leia almost laughed at how expressive the girl’s face was. She had done more laughing in the past five minutes, she thought, than the past five years. “How about we compromise? You take a bath and I’ll wash you; I can’t imagine you’re used to doing that, and I’m guessing you’ll need help.”

“I think I will need help,” Rey agreed.

“Then I’ll dry your hair and give you a back massage. How does that sound?”

Rey squeezed Leia tightly. “Wonderful.”

“Okay.” Leia kissed Rey’s shoulder again. “You’re sure about this? You’re that comfortable with someone you only just met?”

“Not just anyone I only just met. You’re special.”

Leia closed her eyes. “So are you.” Leia stepped back from their embrace, her martial demeanor slipping back into place. “Chow is in an hour and a half. After that…” She smiled slightly, a crack in her military façade. “Come to my quarters, and I’ll show you how special you are.”


	2. It Just Felt Right

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do I even have to say anything?

The older woman’s hands on her back spoke tacitly, or maybe she spoke through the Force: _Let me love you._

Rey laid her head down atop Leia’s soft hair. She remembered what Kylo Ren had whispered to her as he invaded her mind: “So lonely…” Rey shuddered and Leia’s arms enfolded her.

“You’ve been through so much,” Leia murmured.

“So have you,” Rey answered, and Leia was quiet for a moment.

“You’re right. Probably partly why I came to you.” Leia sighed, a quiet, pained noise. “I sensed you hurting, but I needed this too.”

When they had embraced in front of the _Millennium Falcon_ , they had done so out of pure instinct, and Rey hadn’t been thinking about it. Now, she wasn’t sure where to put her hands, so she copied what Leia had been doing for her a moment ago, resting one hand at the base of Leia’s spine and sliding the other hand across her shoulder blades.

Leia leaned up and touched her lips to Rey’s cheek, a soft, comforting gesture. Rey couldn’t remember the last time she had been kissed. She trembled a little and Leia let go of her. “Are you okay? I’m sorry. Of course you’ve been so isolated—“

Leia was cut off by Rey’s lips against hers. She reached up to cradle Rey’s face in her hands the same way she had when Rey had stepped off the _Falcon_.

Rey had never kissed anyone before, but once she figured out that there was a rhythm to it, all she had to do was follow Leia, it wasn’t hard. The kiss was chaste, and a little clumsy due to Rey’s inexperience, but it was warm and gentle.

Eventually the kiss came to a natural end. “Okay, that’s not what I was expecting,” said Leia with a smile. Rey hadn’t seen her smile before that.

“You have a nice smile.”

“You have nice lips.” Leia stroked Rey’s cheek. “Have you ever kissed anyone before?”

“No…but I’m glad it was you.”

“Me too.” Leia tucked a strand of Rey’s hair behind her ear. “Not that I’m complaining, but why did you kiss me?”

“I sensed that you wanted it.”

“That obvious, huh?”

Rey smiled, blushing slightly. “A little, and…I thought…well, I wasn’t thinking. It just felt right.” 

“I’ll say it did. What would you say to another one?”

“I would say yes,” Rey murmured and leaned to kiss Leia again.


	3. You Are Zoomed Out of Your Skull

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey gets an old injury fixed and has an interesting reaction to being loopy on the remnants of anesthesia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I write too much Rey/Leia, but I don't care anymore. More Rey/Leia fics are going to keep happening, I guess.

Rey was working on an X-Wing, grease stains marking her arms and shirt and even her face, when Leia came in. “Morning, Rey. How are you getting along?”

“Hello, General!” Rey waved with a wrench in her hand. “I’m busy.”

“I can see that. I’m glad you’re keeping busy.” Leia paused. “There’s always something to do here. But I wanted to check on you.” She came over to where Rey was working. “I hope I’m not interrupting.”

“I can honestly say I’ve never had the occasion to work on a fighter and talk to someone at the same time,” said Rey, “but…I’m…well, I’m not very good at talking. Haggling, yes, but…”

“You were very isolated on Jakku,” Leia extrapolated. She touched Rey’s shoulder. “Chow is soon. I can’t imagine you had much to eat before…you’re so thin.”

“I’m almost done here,” said Rey. “I’ll make sure to finish before I ask for food.”

Leia tilted her head to one side. “Rey…are you trying to earn your keep?”

Rey picked up a cloth and tried to wipe off her hands, looking puzzled. “Of course.”

Leia smiled, but there was something grim in the expression. “You don’t have to trade anything for food here. Not food, not labor, not fixing X-Wings.”

Rey paused, trying to process that idea. Leia reached for her hand. Rey’s hands were greasy and she pulled away, embarrassed. “My hands are dirty.”

Leia looked wistful for a brief moment. “It’s all right. Why don’t you come find me at chow? I can show you how our cafeteria works.”

Rey nodded gratefully, then something in the open underbelly of the X-Wing caught her eye. “Oh…how did I manage to leave this…?” She reached up and then recoiled, grimacing in pain. “Ah!”

“Are you all right?”

“It’s my bad elbow,” said Rey, cradling it. “I have to be careful not to move it too fast.”

“Let me see.” Leia cupped a hand around Rey’s elbow. “Did you ever injure this elbow before?”

“A few years ago. I guess it didn’t heal right.”

“We should have Dr. Kalonia look at it while you’re here.” Leia carefully probed Rey’s arm. “I’m no doctor, but something definitely feels a little off here. Maybe the bones are out of alignment.”

Rey looked at Leia, panicked, and Leia squeezed her shoulder. “Dr. Kalonia is a real expert. I don’t know what kind of medical care—of lack thereof—you had access to on Jakku, but I promise Dr. Kalonia will take good care of you.”

Rey blinked and Leia sensed her panic ease. “Okay.”

“I can take you there after chow.”

Rey nodded, still looking afraid. Leia gave her shoulder another squeeze. “You don’t have to consent to any medical treatment you don’t want. I’m sure Dr. Kalonia will start with a scan.”

Dr. Kalonia did indeed start with a scan of Rey’s elbow. “Looks like you have an old Melmarian fracture,” she said as she eyed the results. At the look of confusion on Rey’s face, she added, “A fracture of the ulna—one of the bones in your forearm—associated with a dislocation of the top of the other forearm bone. The fracture seems to have healed all right, but the dislocation wasn’t treated, resulting in the pain you currently experience.”

“Can anything be done for Rey’s elbow?” asked Leia.

Kalonia nodded. “Rey, if you want the pain to stop, you’ll need surgery.”

Rey blanched and Leia took her hand. “Surgery with anesthesia,” Leia clarified. “You could put her to sleep until it’s over.”

Kalonia nodded, casting a sympathetic glance at Rey. “You’re from Jakku? I’d imagine most surgery that scavengers can afford involves drinking of copious amounts of alcohol as anesthetic.”

“Yes,” Rey whispered. “If…if ‘anesthetic’ means ‘putting someone to sleep’. I don’t think I’ve heard that word.”

Leia brushed her thumb over Rey’s knuckles. “I’m sorry, I should let you ask the questions.”

Rey swallowed. “Will it hurt?”

“You won’t feel anything while the surgery is taking place. You’ll be asleep,” Kalonia assured Rey. “We can keep you on painkillers while you’re healing. We don’t have the best healing chambers here, but your recovery should be quick.”

“I’ve heard of healing chambers,” said Rey distantly. “I wasn’t sure they really existed. I’ve never seen a ship with them.” She paused. “These…painkillers…is one of them nyex?”

“That is one of the ones I have available, yes,” said Dr. Kalonia.

Rey nodded. “I’d…I’d like to not be given nyex. I saw a lot of people on Jakku get addicted to it.”

Dr. Kalonia nodded. “Comaren it is.”

“Thank you.” Rey looked over at Finn, unconscious on a bed a few feet away.

“There’s no change in your friend’s condition,” said Kalonia. “He’s holding up well.”

Rey took a deep breath. “When can I have the…the surgery?”

Dr. Kalonia brought up her schedule on a nearby screen. “You’ll need to fast for a full 20-hour day beforehand…how about the day after tomorrow at 0530?”

Rey paled. “That’s…soon.” Her grip tightened on Leia’s hand.

“I can accompany you,” Leia offered.

“Can you be there when I wake up too?” Rey asked, biting her lower lip.

“I can certainly have General Organa notified when you’re due to come out of anesthesia,” said Dr. Kalonia at the same time as Leia said “Of course”.

Two days later, Rey was on the examining table again, lying on her back. She squeezed Leia’s hand hard as Dr. Kalonia placed the mask containing sedative gas over her face. Her grip relaxed as the sedative took hold, and after what seemed to Rey to be no time at all, the world clicked into view. Rey blinked, remembering vaguely that her arm had been cut open in order to fix it and she had had to be asleep for it. And…

“Leia?” Rey tried to sit up. Her voice sounded strange to her own ears. And the word she had used was wrong. Princess? Was that the title she was supposed to use? No, it was something else now. The name, though, the name she had known her whole life…

“I’m here.” Rey felt a hand squeeze hers. Her head lolled to the side and she saw General Leia Organa (General, that was it) standing beside her, a small smile on her face.

Rey giggled. She felt strangely light and giddy. “You’re shorter than I thought you’d be.”

“Really?” The general smiled. “Was I taller before you went under?”

“No, I mean when I met you.” Rey reached up clumsily, managing to brush her hand against the other woman’s face. “Still pretty, though.”

Leia snickered and looked at Dr. Kalonia. “What did you give her?”

“Zertoquine, same as I always give unless someone is allergic. And I dosed her by weight.” Kalonia paused. “I was worried, though. She is extremely underweight for her age and height. If she were three kilograms lighter, I wouldn’t have put her under. And speaking of food…” Dr. Kalonia handed Leia a sheet of paper. “She may not remember any of this later, so give this paper to her when she’s more lucid. It has instructions for her post-surgery care as well as her diet. She requires an extremely high number of calories in order to recover from her current state, but her body is so depleted, she may not be able to eat certain foods without being sick.”

“I understand,” said Leia solemnly. “I’ll make sure she gets this.” Leia reached to place a hand on Rey’s forehead. “How do you feel, Rey?”

“Good,” said Rey with another giggle.

“And here is her comaren.” Dr. Kalonia handed Leia a small bottle. “Make sure she gets this too.”

“I will.” Leia pocketed the sheet of paper and the bottle. “Are you ready to go back to your room, Rey?”

“Mm-hmm. Are you escorting me?”

“Yes, I am.” Leia helped Rey up. “All right, you’re walking okay. Just lean on me if you need it.”

“Okay!” Rey wrapped her arm around the other woman’s shoulders and leaned heavily on her.

“You really do weigh nothing.” Leia supported Rey as they walked in the direction of Rey’s quarters. “Rey, would you like to stay in my room? I’m a little worried you will be too loopy to follow Dr. Kalonia’s instructions.”

“Awww, are you gonna take care of me?” Rey laughed.

“I may have to if all you can do is giggle and lean on me.” Leia guided Rey back to her quarters and pulled back the covers on her bed. “You lie down. I’ll go the cafeteria and bring you something. Dr. Kalonia’s instructions say you should eat something liquid and healthy…I’ll bring you a protein shake.” Leia handed Rey the doctor’s instructions. “I don’t know if you’ll remember any of this later, but you should read it. And here is your comaren. It’s 0642 right now; you can take some at 0900, when the anesthesia should be out of your system. If you’re feeling better after chow, Dr. Kalonia’s instructions say that you can get into a healing chamber at 1900 hours at the earliest.”

“Are you leaving?”

“Just to get you some food.”

“Noooo,” Rey whined, wrapping her arms around the other woman’s neck.

“I know what Dr. Kalonia gave you, but I’m still tempted to say ‘what the hell did Dr. Kalonia give you’?”

“You’re so nice to me.” Rey leaned up, pulling Leia close, and tried to kiss her; Leia dodged and Rey’s lips grazed her jaw.

“Excuse me, Rey, what are you doing?”

“Let me kiss you!”

“Why?”

Rey looked at the other woman like she had grown a second head. “Because I want to!”

“That doesn’t really answer my question.” Leia stepped back from Rey. “You get some rest. I’ll bring you a protein shake. What flavor would you like? There’s always a plain one, and I think there’s usually pingpear, and maybe hanava fruit.”

“Ping-what?”

“You’re not used to eating anything with flavor, are you?”

“No.” Rey reached for Leia again. “I like you.”

“I like you too, Rey, but you are zoomed out of your skull at the moment.” Leia kissed Rey’s forehead. “That’s the only kiss you’re getting. You’re too zoomed to consent.”

“Awwwww.” Rey flopped dramatically back onto the bed. When Leia returned a few moments later with Rey’s protein shake, Rey tried to get up; Leia sat down beside her.

“Can you eat okay? Should I help you?”

Rey made a grab for the spoon and missed.

“Okay. I’ll feed you.”

Leia did just that, spooning protein shake into Rey’s mouth as if Rey were a baby. Rey didn’t have her motor control back, but she managed to swallow. When the protein shake was gone, Rey tried to get her arms around Leia again. “Can I call you Leia?”

Leia returned Rey’s hug. “Sure. I have no idea if you’ll remember any of this later, but for now, sure.”

“Leia,” Rey whispered almost worshipfully. “I’ve been wanting to call you that. And I’ve been wanting to kiss you.”

“Later. If you even remember this.”

“Later” turned out to be after Rey had had a nap and Leia woke her for evening chow. “Rey? You need food. Can you wake up?”

Rey stirred. “Hi, Leia. I’m not hungry.”

“I’d imagine that you don’t worry about hunger until the second week, but you need food. Doctor’s orders. Come on.”

Rey groaned. “Ohh, my arm…”

Leia produced the bottle of comaren from her pocket. “Here you go. Can you swallow pills?”

“I don’t know.”

“Damn. I should have asked Dr. Kalonia for liquid medicine.” Leia took Rey’s hand and shook one pill into her palm. “Put it as far back in your throat as you can and swallow…no, wait, not yet. I’ll get you some water.”

Rey was able to swallow the pill, barely. “Ugh.”

“I know.”

“It hurts.”

Leia sighed. “I know. The comaren should kick in in twenty minutes. Then in an hour, you go into the healing chamber.”

“You know what would make me feel better?”

“Food, I’m sure. Dr. Kalonia made it clear how emaciated you are.”

“A kiss.”

Leia’s eyebrows went up. “This again? Dr. Kalonia must have given you too much anesthetic.”

“No, she didn’t. I’m not ‘zoomed’, as I think you said.” Rey stood, holding her arms out to Leia, who shook her head good-naturedly and let Rey hug her.

“Why are you after me to kiss you?”

Rey rested her head on Leia’s hair. “Because you took care of me.”

“I barely did anything.”

“But it means a lot to me.”

Leia stepped back and cupped Rey’s face in her hands. “Are you sure you won’t regret this?”

“I could never regret kissing you,” said Rey, leaning down to touch her lips to Leia’s. It was a long moment before Rey stood upright, and by that time, Leia’s arms were wrapped warmly around her again.

“So, you sure about that total lack of regret?” said Leia.

Rey’s response was to lean down and kiss her again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I recently had my wisdom teeth out, and that gave me the idea of a loopy post-surgery Rey trying to kiss Leia.


	4. Candied Paricha Root

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey stargazes while Leia brings her an after-dinner snack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I like writing from Rey's POV now?

While days on Jakku were blistering, the nights were bitter cold, and I had rarely spent any time outside at night. The mild breeze and star-speckled night sky were totally unfamiliar, but so was all the beautiful greenery, and I had spent every spare second in the hydroponics bay, garden, or here, in the meadow next to the stream that ran a few meters away from the back entrance to the base.

“All right, Rey, I have your snack,” said Leia, walking up behind me. I had been lying down on what Leia called a “picnic blanket”, but when I heard her, I sat up. “There was something of a limited selection, but I brought you a couple things. I wasn’t sure what you’d like.” Leia sat down a tray of food—real food, not the military rations that passed for sustenance on Jakku. “I checked with Dr. Kalonia and she said that any one of these will get you to enough calories for the day.” She indicated the three foods on the tray. “So we have candied paricha root, which I like, but might be a little sweet for someone who is used to living on military rations, and some plaitfruit, which is a little bitter, but a lot of people like them plain, and some dilga-nuts. You have to crack the shells before you eat them.”

Since I had arrived at the Resistance base, I had discovered that I rather liked sweet things, and Leia had said that she liked candied paricha root, so I tried that. The sweetness burst pleasantly across my tongue, along with a tanginess that I didn’t expect but liked. I had to pace myself; I was used to rationing tasteless quarter-portions, but I wanted to inhale nearly everything I had tasted since my arrival on D’Qar. The first few times I had tried that, I had been sick. Every time that had happened, Leia had shown up to comfort me about how it wasn’t my fault and that I wasn’t terrible for wasting food. I still felt guilty that the head of the Resistance was making time to comfort me, but she insisted that she couldn’t get anything done when she could sense that I was in distress. I knew she was exaggerating, but it helped to know that she was trying to make me feel better. After all, she could have been getting some extra sleep right now, but she was in the meadow with me, bringing me food.

I finished off the paricha root and Leia showed me how to crack the dilga-nuts. Those tasted good too, but I didn’t have the right words to describe the taste. I finished the plaitfruit last, which had a lovely balance of bitter and sweet, and other tastes I couldn’t describe.

“I got some candied paricha for myself, but if you’re that hungry, you can have it,” said Leia, offering me a small bowl filled with candied paricha root. I took a few pieces, but I didn’t want to take all of them. “Rey, seriously, you can have them. I’m not hungry, and you need it.”

“Okay.” I took a few more pieces, but taking all of someone’s food, even when they were offering, still seemed wrong. Leia shook her head good-naturedly and finished off the paricha root.

When I was finished eating, I lay back down and looked up at Leia, outlined against the stars. The legends had all spoken of how brave she was, and how beautiful. None of them had mentioned how commanding her presence was or how she could switch that off and suddenly become kind and gentle. She was also beautiful, I thought as I looked up at her silhouette, but there was something special about her that none of the legends had been able to describe.

“Admiring the stars?” she asked me.

“Admiring you,” I corrected. “All the legends I heard about Princess Leia spoke about her beauty.”

She laughed. “Sorry to disappoint. You’re a few years late for that.”

“Why would you say that?” I sat up. “I like the way you look.”

“In this very low light, maybe.”

I reached for her. “I think you’re beautiful.”

“And I should believe you because…”

She was still sort of laughing, but I wasn’t sure whether or not to take her seriously. So I took her face in my hands like she had done for me when we first met, and I leaned forward and kissed her forehead, just below her hairline.

“Okay,” she said in a quiet voice I hadn’t heard from her before. “I wasn’t expecting that.”

“Did I do something wrong? I’ve never kissed anyone before.” Well, that wasn’t entirely true. I had kissed Finn’s forehead, but he was unconscious.

“No, it’s just…funny. Maybe I need to hone my Force sensitivity more, because I was not expecting that.”

I moved closer and rested my forehead against hers. I felt her hands come to rest on my shoulders. “Can you sense what I’m thinking now?” I asked, because I wasn’t entirely sure. I felt my heart racing. 

“I don’t need the Force to tell that you’re nervous,” she said. “You’ve gotten your point across, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“No, I…” I licked my lips. “I was just thinking about how much you’ve helped me since I got here, and how if…” I took a deep breath. “If I were to kiss anyone, I would want it to be you.”

She brushed one hand briefly against my cheek. “Are you sure you wouldn’t rather wait until Finn woke up? That boy would do anything for you. I sensed that the second he opened his mouth to tell me the Resistance needed to help rescue you from the First Order.”

“I think…I do love Finn,” I said slowly. “As a friend. Maybe more, at some point, but…right now, I don’t want to kiss him. I want to kiss you.”

“Only if you’re sure,” she said in a voice that could almost be described as “solemn”.

“I’m sure,” I said. “What about…what about you? I mean…I know I’m just a scavenger.”

“Don’t say that,” said Leia, giving my shoulders a quick squeeze. “You aren’t just anything.”

“So…can I kiss you?”

I didn’t think that asking for permission was funny, but Leia chuckled. “Yes.”

The moon had fully risen and I only could only see by its light and the light of the stars, but I could see well enough to lean down and press my mouth to Leia’s. 

She tasted like candied paricha root.


	5. Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey snuggles with Leia. Things escalate.

It was Rey’s second night sleeping beside General Organa. On the first night, Rey had had nightmares, and General Organa (no, Rey reminded herself, she had asked to be called Leia) hadn’t been able to sleep either. She had invited Rey back to her quarters, which were nicer than the ones Rey had been assigned, and Rey had come back to Leia’s quarters and used her private bathroom to take a long bath before climbing into bed and falling asleep holding Leia’s hand. Tonight, she didn’t know how to proceed. Leia was half-asleep with her back to Rey, and Rey wanted to hold hands again. Rey lay down behind Leia and reached for her shoulder, her palm resting there awkwardly for a moment.

“You can come closer,” said Leia, her voice slow and heavy with sleepiness.

Rey felt her cheeks flush. “I…don’t know how.”

“Put your chest against my back and your knees against the backs of my knees. Like we’re puzzle pieces.”

“Okay.”

Rey carefully nestled close to Leia. “Like puzzle pieces” felt like a good description; due to their height difference, Rey was pressed comfortably against Leia with her face just above the other woman’s head. She blushed a little as she realized how intimate their position was; her hips were flush with Leia’s. She supposed that it didn’t seem especially intimate to someone like Leia, who was more used to physical contact and was still well on her way to being asleep despite Rey cuddling close to her. “Like this?”

“Mmm. You can put your arm around me. If you want.”

Rey hadn’t been sure what to do with her arms, so she draped her arm over Leia, and her blush went from mild to blazing as the back of one hand accidentally brushed against one of Leia’s breasts. Rey moved her arm to Leia’s waist, feeling as though her cheeks were on fire. Leia didn’t react, though, and Rey felt her blush die down eventually.

Her hand still tingled, though, and she couldn’t stop thinking about how soft the flesh she had touched had been. Almost without thinking, she moved her arm up Leia’s torso, pretending to readjust her position, and her forearm briefly rested against Leia’s breasts. _So soft_ , Rey thought, her heart beginning to race.

“That curious, are you?” said Leia, her voice still sleepy but also amused. “At least bring me flowers first.”

Rey’s blush came back full force. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

“I know you aren’t used to physical contact. But ask next time, okay?”

Rey pressed her face to Leia’s hair to hide her blush, even though she knew Leia couldn’t see her face. “Okay.”

Rey dreamed about flowers, and then the following day, she spent hours exploring D’Qar and taking in how much lush vegetation grew there. On her way back, she picked some flowers for Leia, and she gave them to Leia at dinner. Leia gave her a quick hug and put the flowers in water.

That night, Rey lay close to Leia again, and this time, she carefully placed her arm around Leia’s waist. “Just there?” Leia whispered, sounding much more awake this time. “You did bring me flowers.”

Rey flattened her hand against Leia’s belly. “Are you sure?”

Leia was quiet for a moment. “I _hurt_ , Rey. I hurt all over. Ever since I sensed Han’s death, I’ve been carrying that, and so many died in the attack on the Hosnian system. It’s too much. I worried it was too much when I first started looking for my brother.” Leia paused. “But it doesn’t hurt as much when you’re close to me.”

“Okay,” Rey whispered. She moved her hand to Leia’s face, brushing one knuckle against her cheekbone, then trailed her fingertips down Leia’s neck. Not wanting to repeat her half-unintentional actions from the previous night, she took her time, stroking Leia’s arm and exploring the curve from her waist to her hip.

“What made you into such a gentleman—or rather, gentlewoman—today?” Leia teased.

“I just…I want to do this right,” Rey said, feeling like she wasn’t explaining herself at all.

“You are.”

Rey felt her heart begin to race again as she slid her hand to Leia’s breast, caressing with the back of her hand as gently as she could manage. The only response she got from Leia was a small sigh that was nonetheless encouraging. Rey cupped her hand around the fullness of Leia’s breast and made tiny circles with her thumb.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been groped so innocently,” Leia mused.

“I don’t think I’m…I’m…” Rey couldn’t spit out her objection to Leia’s choice of words.

“I’m teasing. I guess I shouldn’t tease you…I can’t imagine you’re used to it.”

“So you’re teasing, but not…not complaining, right?”

“Oh, no. I’m not complaining. Not at all.”

Rey squeezed lightly and her blush returned with a vengeance as she felt Leia’s nipple stiffen through the cloth of her pajama top. Was that a good thing? She shifted position so she could reach Leia’s other breast.

“The other one is pretty much the same,” said Leia dryly.

Rey wasn’t sure how to respond other than to continue her soft touches. Leia sighed and pressed her back against Rey’s chest. Rey rested her face against Leia’s hair, experimentally teasing the other woman’s nipple with her thumb. Leia bit back a noise that sounded like a moan and Rey thought she was going to protest, but instead she undid the buttons on her shirt. “Keep going.”

That was definitely a command. Rey obeyed, shyly, unable to hold back a gasp as she touched Leia’s impossibly tender skin for the first time. “You’re so soft.”

“I guess I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Rey brushed her fingertips over the swells of Leia’s breasts. “Are you sure you want me to do this?”

“Yes.” A pause. “Unless…it’s too much for you.”

Rey closed her eyes. “Not…too much, just…unexpected.”

Leia turned over to face Rey, her expression solemn. Her shirt lay open, exposing the flesh Rey had been exploring, and Rey licked her lips unintentionally. “Oh, you’re beautiful,” Rey whispered.

Leia smiled and shook her head. “Well, I’m glad you think that.” She reached up and stroked Rey’s cheek. “May I kiss you?”

Rey bit her lower lip. _Another first for me_ , she thought. “I don’t know if I’m doing any of this right,” she confessed. “But I’d love to kiss you.”

Leia cradled the back of Rey’s head in her hand, edged closer, and touched her lips to Rey’s for a long moment. “How was that?”

“Over too soon,” Rey whispered. “Can I kiss you again?”

Leia responded by pulling Rey closer and Rey found herself the recipient of a deep, hungry kiss, much less chaste than the first one. Rey kissed Leia back, hoping she was doing it right and figuring she was, since it felt good. Rey wasn’t sure what to do with her hands, so she did what she knew Leia enjoyed, cradling her breasts and massaging gently.

Leia sighed, tilting her head back, and Rey leaned over to kiss her neck. She did so shyly, hoping Leia wasn’t ticklish. “Rey,” Leia moaned, her voice dense with need, her hands gripping Rey’s shoulders. “I want you.”

Rey trembled. “What do you want to do to me?”

Leia turned her head and kissed Rey’s hair. “I’d like to kiss you all over. And then, if you’re okay with it, I’d like to try going down on you. I’ve never done that for a woman before, but I want to make you feel good.”

Rey laid her head down on Leia’s shoulder. “Can we kiss more first?”

Leia stroked Rey’s hair, leaving kisses on her scalp. “We can go as slowly as you want. Or we can stop.”

Rey pulled the cloth of Leia’s shirt aside and kissed her bare shoulder. “I don’t want to stop.”

“Before we keep going, I want you to promise me something.”

Rey nuzzled the base of Leia’s neck. “Promise what?”

“That if you change your mind and want to stop, you’ll tell me.”

Rey sat up, puzzled. “But…I can sense how much you need this.” As she spoke, she knew the words were true. She was still getting used to sensing other people’s feelings.

“I won’t die if I don’t get to have sex with you,” said Leia, smiling. “And I know you haven’t done this before. And…this is moving awfully fast.”

Rey brushed some of Leia’s hair back from her face. “If you want me, I’m here.” Her voice shook a little.

Leia wrapped her arms tightly around Rey. “You deserve a better first time than on this hard army-issue bed.”

“I’ve never had a bed before.”

Leia kissed Rey’s cheek. “Promise me,” she said doggedly.

Rey took a deep breath. “I promise.”

“I was nervous my first time too,” said Leia, running her hand up and down Rey’s back. “I’ll be gentle.”

“I trust you.”

“Okay.” Leia gave Rey a small kiss and rested her forehead against Rey’s. “So you’ve never done this, and I’ve never done this with a woman. But I think we can figure it out.”

Rey sat up and began unbuttoning her shirt. “Me too.”


	6. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia comforts Rey after she has a nightmare.

“Get out of my head!” Rey wept over and over. “Get out!”

Beside her, Leia stirred. The sound of Rey’s sobs woke her faster than any stimulant would have; she sat up and gathered Rey into her arms. “You’re safe,” Leia whispered. “You’re safe, Rey.” She cradled Rey’s scalp with one hand, caressing her hair; after her first nightmare, Rey had tearfully told Leia that Kylo Ren had gripped her scalp when he had invaded her mind (or at least it felt like he had), and Leia had quickly discovered that having her head touched gently was soothing to Rey.

Rey quieted after a few minutes. “Leia?”

“I’m here.”

Rey had cried all over Leia’s pajama shirt; she shifted so her face was resting against a drier area. “I’m sorry I’m crying all over you.”

“It’s all right.” Leia continued stroking Rey’s hair. “I’ve had my share of nightmares. In fact, I think that ties us up now. This is your second nightmare tonight?”

“Yes.”

“So we’re at four each, total, since you started sleeping in my bed. I don’t think you owe me an apology.”

Rey sat back. “I still got your shirt covered in tears. And snot.”

“Lovely.” Leia got up and went to her wardrobe. Rey turned away while Leia changed her shirt, and Leia came back to the bed, gathering Rey into her arms. Rey nestled her face against Leia’s throat.

“Thank you for holding me,” Rey whispered, squirming to get her arms around Leia.

“You’re welcome. I know how deprived of physical contact you’ve been. Does it help?”

Rey closed her eyes. “A little.”

Leia held Rey for a long time, still touching her hair and scalp in that way she knew Rey found soothing. Eventually, Rey whispered, “I’m okay to get up.”

“Okay.” Instead of just letting Rey go, Leia laid Rey down on the mattress and kissed her forehead. She lay down beside Rey, draping an arm over Rey’s waist.

“Leia?”

“Hmm?”

Rey turned toward Leia, resting her forehead against the other woman’s. “I like when you kiss me. But…can you kiss me on the lips?”

Leia quirked an eyebrow. “Why would you ask that?”

“Because I want to know how it feels. I like how it feels when you kiss my forehead or my cheek.”

Leia brushed a strand of sweaty hair back from Rey’s face. “Only if you’re sure. You did just wake up from a nightmare. You might not be at your sharpest right now.”

Rey smiled shakily. “I’ve been thinking about kissing you for a while.”

Leia leaned forward and softly touched her lips to Rey’s, a small, innocent gesture; a good-night kiss. “How was that?”

Rey reached for Leia, cupping her hand around the back of Leia’s head. “It was nice. Can I kiss you again?”

“Is this because Be—Kylo told you that you were lonely? You don’t have to prove that he was wrong.”

Rey closed her eyes. “No. It’s because he was right.”

“I know you like affection,” said Leia slowly, “but maybe it shouldn’t have extended to kisses.”

Rey blinked. “Why?”

“It would seem you don’t have much context, but kissing on the lips is fairly intimate in a lot of cultures.”

“Well, then, I like being intimate with you,” said Rey stubbornly.

Leia shook her head, smiling. “It’s a little early for that. I shouldn’t have kissed you.”

“Why did you?” Rey pressed.

Leia closed her eyes. “Because I also just woke up, wasn’t thinking, and wanted to be close to you.”

Rey let her hand slide down to Leia’s neck. “If we both want it, why can’t I kiss you?”

Leia made a noise that Rey couldn’t decipher. “Okay! Okay. Fine. Come here.”

Rey pulled Leia close—or maybe Leia pulled her close; she wasn’t sure—and their lips met. Rey was a little clumsy, but she thought she got the hang of it pretty quickly. So did Leia.

“How was that?” Leia asked in a low voice.

“Good,” Rey whispered.

“You want more?”

Rey nodded. “Yes.”

“Good, because so do I.”

Rey leaned in and kissed Leia again, moaning against the other woman’s mouth as Leia’s arm wrapped around her waist, pressing their bodies together. Leia backed off. “Are you all right? I’m sorry. This is what happens when you put a lonely old woman in bed with a beautiful young woman.”

Rey brushed a hand against Leia’s cheek. “You’re not old. And you’re beautiful.”

Leia smiled, a little sadly. “Thank you.” She passed a hand up and down Rey’s back. “Is this okay?”

“Anything you want to do to me is okay.” The words fell off Rey’s tongue before she could think.

Leia raised her eyebrows. “Are you sure? That’s a dangerous thing to say.”

“I trust you.”

Leia’s expression became more solemn. “I’ll have to make sure that trust isn’t misplaced. How about we stick to kisses for now?”

Rey moved her hand to the low of Leia’s back. “Okay. Keep touching my back? I like that.”

“Whatever you want,” said Leia, leaning in to kiss Rey again.


End file.
